35 year old EMO

I'm too old for EMO anything. But right now I can relate. In a way I was perhaps one of the foremothers of the EMO...Like so very many other GenXers..Joy Division and cherry red docs etc etc in 90's..As for my fashion sense now..is all going a bit pear shaped as I'm morphing into comfy linen pants and sweatshirts brigade. And I'm too damn wise and experienced to be nearly eaten alive by emotional "pain". I don't think I'm borderline whatever, but I'm certainly lacking the fortifying mental blubber to survive well in this hell I'm in. Went for coffee with new flatmate this morning and as we both mid 30's unmarried and have short hair wondered & worried vaguely if anyone thought we might be gay..back to emotional pain..always in the background at warps that go up or down or around and around dependant on absolutely fack all..although moving cities and hearing ex has friend rooting women that calls herself Miss Daisy on NZ dating is disgusting and depressing to say the least..so that means she is probably offering it to the ex. who's is mentally unhinged and no doubt up for it. So round and round it rages...no respite in site, no relief or give up from the unrelenting duo of feeling emo pain without the nice rosy skin and clothes..combined with lurid thoughts of all kinds of things. Ive totally given up on most people, I'm not going to become a christian anytime soon..but do believe most adults are debauched cretins spending too much time with their hands down their pants.